Alpha Rules E-course: Episode 3

Do you really want to be a "pickup artist?"

Carlos & Dean's Desk - Wednesday, 1:02 PM:

We get a lot of emails from guys asking about what it's like to be a "pickup artist."

There are also a lot of guys who want to know about all these new reality television shows, like "Pick-up Artist" and "Beauty and the Geek."

First, let's talk a little about the term "pick-up artist" for just a second.

What does the term really mean?

Well, in my book, a pickup artist is a guy who cultivates specific social skills - a system - to attract beautiful women so that he will get an advantage in the dating and seduction game.

Does being a pickup artist mean that he's a bad guy?

A jerk?

A woman-hater?

No, not one bit. However, as we're about to tell you, many of the so-called "pick-up artists" don't comprehend the true nature of these attraction skills.

Many of these pick-up artists (PUAs, as they're often called - sometimes pronounced "poo-ah") simply want to be able to "stack" things in their favor because they feel hurt or insecure about the fact that women control the sex. It goes without saying that if you're looking to trick or manipulate women to build up your low self-esteem, becoming a "PUA" is not the way to do it.

First of all, I want you to realize something: Most guys (and pick-up artists) just want a level playing field when it comes to dating and attracting women. They want to get rid of the mystery from the social dynamics game and learn how to authentically attract women and reclaim some of their sexual power.

Some men have even asked us, "But, aren't you guys pick-up artists?"

No, we're not.

We do not use that term to describe ourselves, and here's why: We're simply Alpha Men looking to improve our social charisma.

When we were fortunate enough to figure out how these techniques and strategies worked, and that they're actually the key to becoming more successful in LIFE, that's when we felt it was time for us to write The Alpha Rules. We knew they help other guys race up the learning curve and stack the deck the correct way: By becoming an Alpha Man and living the Alpha Lifestyle.

You see, when you become more socially savvy and aware, you stop being merely a "pickup artist" and you become the ALPHA - the leader of the pack, the man that women cannot resist.

YOU control the attention structure of the tribe - your circle of friends, your family, your co-workers... You are the ALPHA.

Now the first skill you really need to work on is your social networking ability.

Huh? What do you mean?
I just want to get more women in my life, guys.

Well, we hate to be the one to break this news to you, but the most important step in being attractive to women is to be attractive to almost everyone around you.

You see, something we noticed about ourselves and all the other people out there that got really good with women was that they were all genuinely interested in other people. Even if they were an "introvert" (which doesn't mean 'shy,' by the way) They still found reasons to initiate comfortable conversations with other people.

If you go out with the idea in your head that you're only going to talk to this one attractive woman in the store - or the bar, or the party, or wherever - you're actually hurting your chances at getting her interested in you.

Yes, you read that right. If you go out trying to do "pickup" on women when you go out, you make it worse for yourself over the long run.

You know, most guys have a very active dating life. In their imaginations, that is.

They fantasize about all sorts of things about women, and end up creating what we call a Counterproductive Desperation Attitude.

Sure, you can call it a "CDA" for short. But we're not hung up on clever acronyms around here. Just think of it as: "That freaky vibe."

A guy will think about approaching a hot woman so much that he ends up creating a very insecure and nervous vibe when he finally does go up and talk to a woman. She senses this - immediately - and it's the one thing that will freak her out and repulse her.

Instead, what he should be doing is reducing that level of anxiety and intense focus so that when he's in any social situation, he's already conditioned to talk to anyone around him.

One way to accomplish this is to do an exercise like this:

The next time you're in a line or queue for a movie, or your grocery store, anyplace at all, just turn sideways and look at the person behind you or near you for a second. (It doesn't matter if it's a man or woman for the purposes of our exercise.)

Ask yourself: What do you think his/her story is?

Take a good long look (without making it obvious that you're doing so.) Imagine one thing you would ask them if you had just encountered them in another social situation. Then, look away and glance at a magazine for a second to forget about that person and lower your anxiety about them.

Then, just as you feel relaxed, turn back and ask them your question.

The key to this exercise is that you have to feel like an authority - someone who has a right to talk to strangers, and that you are not doing anything "wrong" or "weird" by talking to them.

As Eleanor Roosevelt once said:
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

Feel justified and empowered, no matter what the other person's response is.

If this is too much to do initially, then you can warm up a little by just chatting up the clerk or someone who has to talk to you because of their job. This will take some of the edge off the conversation and allow you to move further along, and also remove some of the mental angst of talking to "strangers."

You want to talk to as many people as you can in your day-to-day lifestyle, so that when it comes time to talk to the women that really matter to you, it will feel much more natural to her.

Being a good pickup artist is what a lot of guys aspire to, only to discover that what they were really doing all along was being a naturally interesting person.

You can do better... you can become 3-dimensional and genuine with women through The Alpha Rules.

A lot of guys have read Neil Strauss' book The Game and now think that the clever openers and one-liners that he talks about will work for them.

It might, but it probably won't.

Why not?

Because you have to have the ability to project your personality with any technique, or women will see right through you and walk away.

Trust us. We used to do it the same way:

- Walk up to woman

- Use clever line or witty opener

- Apply a "neg hit" or some other technique to play off her self-esteem

- Close by asking her for her phone number

What we found was that we got really good at getting numbers, but without the right Alpha Man Attitude, women weren't buying into it. Second dates were rare, and sex was unlikely.

You need techniques that will work anywhere, on any woman, and at any time. This strategy will also yield you more personal success and fulfillment than any other "seduction program" out there.

It's time to learn the BIG picture of what attraction skills can do for you, your self-confidence, and your success in life.

You can download your copy of this electronic book right away and get started on the authentic path to male self-confidence and success with women.

Good luck with this technique, and be sure to send us your success stories.

We'll be back again with another part of the Alpha Lifestyle e-course...

- Carlos & Dean